Last week, I mentioned that just over 10 years ago on January 15, 2002, my life and hopes were shattered when my first wife died and my skull was fractured in the horrible car accident that occurred.  So in these blogs, I'm explaining the 3 most significant ways I've been changed over this past decade as we stand at the 10 year mark of that life-changing event.

Today's is a particular shift from SELF-reliance to GOD-reliance...

...which I now believe is literally one of the main reasons for our times of suffering, or sort of a "why answer"... i.e. why a good God lets us suffer -- to cause us self-reliant people to depend on Him more.

You see, between the apostle Paul's two letters to the church in Corinth, they suffered (and so did he), which is why 2 Corinthians 1:9 says, "In our hearts we felt the sentence of death.  This happened so that we might not rely on ourselves but on God who raised the dead."

A very, very tough lesson to learn, but oh so valuable.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”   2 Corinthians 12:9a

Just over 10 years ago on January 15, 2002, my life was shattered when my first wife died and my skull was fractured in the horrible car accident that occurred.

As a preacher, I shared with our church's congregation 3 of the most significant ways I had been changed over this past decade, as we stand at the 10 year mark of that life-changing event.  I'll do my best to explain them over the next few blogs here.

The first one is the character point of PERSEVERANCE (endurance) that grew significantly in me.  In the original Bible text, perseverance means to "endure under pressure," like a warrior in battle with a shield, pressing on toward the enemy while under attack.  Scripture says that trials produce perseverance (James 1:3).  In our words, it simply means "never quitting," "never giving up," or "always pressing forward."

More to come...

And that's not all. We are full of joy even when we suffer. We know that our suffering gives us the strength to go on. The strength to go on produces character. Character produces hope.   Romans 5:3-4

Friends,

Given what I've been thru (& now that I'm a pastor) I am often asked to be a "Life Coach." So on Saturday, 1/21, at Westminster Christian Academy (1:00-3:00) I'll be speaking for 2 hours, & then open for more individual Life Coaching times..

TELL ME IF YOU WANNA COME ON THE FACEBOOK PAGE!!!

http://www.facebook.com/events/224073124340730/

Description:

Almost 10 years ago, Jason Mirikitani endured a tragic car accident that killed his wife & almost took his own life. Now, he is an Assistant Pastor, an author (http://www.MileMarkerBook.com), & a speaker, who frequently offers hope and points to God's grace with special insights... (http://www.ourRescuer.com)

In this Christian Life Coaching Seminar, Jason will explain from life and pastoral experience what it means for a person to be God-reliant in several different aspects of life rather than self-reliant, and how that affects us as parents, spouses, and professionals. He will close by offering to extend his Life Coaching services in an individual way to attendees beyond this group seminar.

It seems that certain things traditionally happen at the start of every New Year... People set forth New Year's Resolutions. They look back and reconsider the past year's highs and lows, and perhaps ways to learn from mistakes. They celebrate wonderful moments from the previous year and try to forget the worst ones.

As I personally trace back over 2011, I think I will always recall it with wet eyes.

• I will remember it as the year that our 4 year old son, JoJo, started wanting to help people out, and wanting to pray for people, having faith that God would answer his prayers.

• I will remember it as the year that our 11 year old daughter made several personal adjustments to be an amazing big sister to her 4 year old little brother.

• I will remember it as another year that Christe, my wife, often told me she loved me and was proud of me.

• And I will remember it as the year I got to write down a story with a tragic start that would point lots and lots of people toward Hope (www.milemarkerbook.com).

All in all, 2011 points to yet another year of the workings of a faithful God in the midst of life's difficulties.

He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. Colossians 1:17

This week I'll be back on the wrestling mat again; I am a referee now. I enjoy giving back to this sport that for many years of my life gave me so much:  fun, competition, and drive. In all my wrestling disappointments and successes, the #1 lesson I've learned is perseverance.

In the Bible, the original word for PERSEVERANCE means to "endure under pressure."  I'm sure glad I started to learn that trait as a kid!

We also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. Romans 3:3-4

Sometimes, because of certain reasons, it seems pretty hard to say, "Thank you."

When my sister-in-law was a kid, some teen-age boys were going around the neighborhood busting up jack-o-lanterns for fun... and they crushed Angela's, crushing her little spirit along with her pumpkin. As her mom hugged her, she reminded her of the biblical principal to "give thanks in all cicumstances" (1 Thess. 5:18). Her frustrated dad, meanwhile, was gathering the broken pieces and throwing them in his garden and in the compose pile.

Well, the next harvest season... there were 24 pumpkins growing in that garden!

Just last week, JoJo was saying how much fun it would be to jump into some leaf piles. So I got my rake out, and the fun soon began one chilly afternoon in our yard - for our whole family!

Later that night (when I warmed up a bit), something occurred to me: I bet the religious leaders of His day were offended that Jesus often referred to God as His FATHER (no one had ever called "the Holy One of Israel" that before!)... because a father or a dad is personal and familiar, is intimate in His loving care and compassion.

Suddenly this unknown God was warm and friendly... and approachable. 

God's Spirit doesn't make us slaves who are afraid of him. Instead, we become his children and call him our Father.   Romans 8:15

Our kids were adorable Trick-or-Treaters... JoJo was a "Pirate Pumpkin," and Abby was "Maid Marian"... not to mention Krypto, our Superdog!  And, I'll admit that I am excited about the one day of the year when no one thinks I'm (as much of) a nut for putting on a costume... so, yes, I was Superman, "The Man of Steel," and I frequently commended other adult trick-or-treaters for being "good citizens."

I laughed out loud yesterday at a grocery store when I saw a Halloween sign that said, "No One Over 12 Years Old Allowed in Masks." (I think that was a serious sign, though.)  But don't most of us wear masks often in our daily lives?  We put forward a fake "front," we try hard to look better than we really are... Of course we do! Who wants the world to know how we really are?!

At one point in the Gospels, Jesus really called out the religious leaders on this one, referring to them as "whitewashed tombs" (Matt. 23:27), pretenders who were really dead on the inside even though they were beautiful on the outside. Ouch. At first, stuff like that makes me not wanna read my Bible, until I remember that it was written by the One who loves me unconditionally in spite of all my mess... So my mask comes off (my secret identity is out!

Christe recently read JoJo a story about different types of fruit trees and how they grow. He then became certain that he had to have one, and we chose a pear tree at the store.

Planting it was a huge task for us (mostly me, of course), since the instructions said to dig a hole twice as deep and wide as our pot that held the tree. I was happy and confident, though, because of where I planted it... in the downhill corner of our yard where all the water would flow to help the tree... and then he prayed a blessing over it (!) with closed eyes facing up: "Jesus, make it rain to help my tree!"

I expect JoJo's pear tree will be abundantly fruitful.

"But I will bless any man who trusts in me... He will be like a tree that is planted near water... It is not afraid when heat comes.  Its leaves are always green... It always bears fruit."     Jeremiah 17:7-8

I should admit some significant personal mile markers that the last few weeks included... that my family and I graciously celebrated: my wife Christe and I had our 5th Anniversary at the end of August, and my 40th Birthday was last weekend.

At Kanakuk Kamps in the Missouri Ozarks, a Christian youth camp where I worked for many summers, we often tell kids on their birthdays, "I'm glad you were born!" Interestingly in my case, as you probably know, it's remarkable that I didn't die before either of these celebrations... that I made it past my birthday 10 years ago!

So I walk today in humble gratitude to God for His miraculous rescue and gracious provision of my sugar sweet wife and my adorable children.

He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. Colossians 1:17

As I've mentioned before, I've been coaching Abby's soccer team for several years. In her first game a few days ago, she scored twice (!), and the first one was so awesome that it should win an ESPY award! So as her team's coach, I got so excited that I ran out on the field with my knees about as high as my chest, pumpin' my fists, and screaming like mad... ending in hugging Abby tightly. I've never done drugs before, but it was a total high, and I acted completely foolishly.  I was unbelievably proud of her at that glorious moment.

Looking back, I have to wonder what some of my players' parents might have been thinking when they saw their coach (whom they know by now) running out on the field looking like a nut and going crazy for his team and specifically for his daughter. I hope (and I think) they're cool with it. Ultimately though, I was encouraged to think that I was just acting like God the Father who "delights in His children" and "rejoices over (us)"...

The LORD your God... will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.
Zephaniah 3:17

I don't understand why miscarriage is such a taboo subject, why it's one of "silent suffering," especially now that my wife and I now sadly share in it, one that affects countless women daily.

We knew that in telling some friends so early about our pregnancy, that we ran a certain risk. But we knew our friends who shared in our joy would also share in our suffering.

Below is a letter that my dear wife Christe wrote in response to a blog about this oh-so-difficult matter. I wanted to share it with you because we've discovered that sharing hurts helps with healing... for all involved hopefully.

***

Dear Karen,

I am a friend of ___. I read on her page sometime last week where she had commented on a note that you had written. I went to the note and read about your heavenly babies, secretly hoping I would not have to endure the pain you spoke of, as I was 6 1/2 weeks pregnant at the time. A few days later, I began spotting and on Sept 6, I miscarried our baby having carried him or her for 7 1/2 weeks. I am so very sad but I feel so encouraged by your note and the fact that our heavenly babies are in heaven praising our God, getting a head start on what we were all created to do.

I went on to read tonight about how you have named all your babies in heaven, and I knew that was something we needed to do. I have always wanted to name a child Judah but knew because we already have a Josiah that the name Judah was probably out. I could just hear him saying, "I am the king of you!" (You probably remember where Josiah is the boy king of Judah.)

When I read where you named a child Judah because it meant "Praise," I felt in my spirit that was to be the name of our child as well. I know that the only way to get through this time is to praise God even more. I feel closer to my baby knowing that we can join in praising God together...me here on Earth, and my baby in God's presence.

My parents have taught me to thank God in ALL things, good or bad. That can be soooo hard at times. I can truly say that I am grateful for the deeper desire to praise God that this hurt has brought me and for the motivation to cling less to this world and more to our heavenly home. I look forward to the day I join my little Judah in heaven praising our awesome God together in His presence.

Thank you for sharing your hurts because they have helped to start healing mine.

God Bless You,
Christe Mirikitani

***

He comforts us in all our troubles. Now we can comfort others when they are in trouble. We ourselves have received comfort from God. We share the sufferings of Christ. We also share his comfort.
2 Corinthians 1:4-5

As a preacher on Labor Sunday with a bit of freedom, I lowered our church's projector screen and played this old "Noah" clip by Bill Cosby, as I shared a message on the magnitude of Noah's labor that God called him to do...

- to build a boat bigger than a football field
- with no electricity or modern technology
- with no army of workers
- in the middle of the wilderness
- as a very old man
- to gather a pair of every species of animal

It's no wonder Mr. Cosby did a hilarious comedy routine on this!!!

It's even more amazing that this faithful old man trusted and obeyed God... and that God enabled him to follow through with all of it.

"And Noah did all that the LORD commanded him."
Genesis 6:22, 7:5

http://www.tiny.cc/CosbyNoah

I've been told that children spell love, "T-I-M-E." That may be one reason why Abby likes playing soccer so much, since I've always been her coach... for 6 years now. And this year JoJo will get to start playing in the "Rookie Soccer" league on the YMCA fields as well, and I will coach him too.

It's interesting, with a parent/child relationship in mind, that Jesus referred to God as his (and everyone's) Father for the very first time. You see, no one had ever called God, "Father" before this. Jesus declared that God had a personal interest in His children, that He wanted to spend time with them, that he cared about what was happening in their lives, and wanted to be involved.

Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.
Luke 6:36

Since the book released about ten months ago, a handful of folks have asked me if I'm gonna start writing a second book. I told them that my weekly blogs are the closest thing right now. In that vein of thinking, though, I've decided to give my blogs a title from here forward:

EXTRA MILES, More Thoughts Since Mile 825

"He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."
Philippians 1:6